HFU Post 2
HFU Post 2 restarts the Hero Force One series with Hero Force Ultimate. We open with Brittica, formerly Britt, who is now trapped in an ink-washed location of Hell. She currently inhabits a clone, having lost her original body in NeS2 Post ?. She had fallen through a portal in NeS2 Post ? and wound up here. On Earth, Hero Force has all but disbanded leaving just a small rag-tag bunch of old Hero Force One members who rarely go out and do anything. Their funding was drastically reduced after Donald Trump became president, so they aren't even able to reach their old headquarters of Orbital One. Instead they use the Biltmore Estate, which was granted to the team by a mysterious benefactor. Flax Hyperon, the space adventurer, as seriously let himself go and is now an overweight man that does nothing but stay at home watching television and playing video games and is barely able to get up. The whole estate is in a state of complete disrepair and is quite disgusting. Hero Plus One, Benjiamin Mahir, is lying on top of once-important machinery reading from "The Big Book of Random Useless Facts" out of boredom. He reads off a bunch of facts until they decide to go play games and order pizza. In Egypt, Winters, the android servant to Britt, has scried to view where her master is. She was confused because she kept finding a blonde woman instead but she comes to the conclusion Britt's blood must have allowed him to transfer into this new body somehow. She then decides to get help from someone that owes his life to Britt. Back at the Biltmore Estate again, Seraphim, leader of HFO, returns only to be repulsed by the state of the place. Magick Snowflakes, still in her pyjamas, has joined the two men for video games. Seraphim has lost her divine powers due to her former relationship with Acidspitter, as in NeS2 Post ?, but is still the most active member of the team. When Winters shows up, she asks for help from Dr R. Deep who still owes Britt his aid. Seraphim is deeply pleased to finally get a worthy mission. Post Brittica is a beautiful young woman with bright blonde hair and is wearing a tight-fitted robe of white. Over that she had a thick, fur-lined parka jacket that was clearly borrowed from a big man. She is also man. A man trapped in a woman's body. Literally. Once on the verge of death he was given the opportunity to claim a new body - an empty clone vessel - and claim it he did. Now she forgets she's a woman from time-to-time but is reminded frequently by bodily functions like needing to squat to pee and not beating her chest like a gorilla. Not that she would do that very often but the point stands. ::101:: She is walking through a wilderness that she doesn't recognise. She had fallen through a portal and woke up in the middle of nowhere. Unfortunately the horrendous black-and-white landscape tells her that she's not on Earth. Nothing is in colour; the dead trees are black, the ground is dark grey and the sky is stark white. She feels like she's been drawn into a mangaManga article, Wikipedia. book. Damn lazy manga artists, never colouring anything! Not like her beloved Marvel comicsMarvel Comics article, Wikipedia.! Hero Force has been depleted and broken down into a skeletal organisation since the last major invasion of Earth and the main team, once known as Hero Force One, have barely seen active duty. Some members left, others forgotten in the destruction that once was and those that remain are getting out-of-shape. Especially Flax Hyperon. Once the rugged and handsome sci-fiScience-fiction article, Wikipedia. adventurer, Flax has let himself go. He now weighs over two-hundred and fifty pounds and could be described as 'rotund'. He generally wears skin-tight outfits that bulge at the seams as though he is still the dashing man he once was. He manages to pull off his sexy voice still, though now it would be described as 'a voice for radio... and definitely, not ever the television'. With a chilli-dog in hand, he walks down the hall of the Biltmore Estate, the current, and only, Hero Force headquarters. The old headquarters was a space station named Orbital One. It is still up there, spinning around the planet, and empty. But the team can no longer afford the frequent flights in and out of the atmosphere and have become grounded. Donald Trump, the President, shifted most of the original funds for Hero Force into building his wall. The Biltmore Estate, located in North Carolina, was donated to the Hero Force team by a mysterious benefactor who probably just took pity on the once celebrated team. Much of the interior had been redesigned for the team's use, though many of the rooms still stand empty and undecorated like a job half done. Hero Plus One: "Did you know KaraokeKaraoke article, Wikipedia. means "empty orchestra" in Japanese, Flax?" Hero Plus One, whose true identity is Benjiamin Mahir, is sitting on top of a cupboard in the hall. Having the ability to turn into a rat and then back into a human again means he is often found in the most unusual of places - commonly somewhere well out of harm's way. He lies there, reading "The Big Book of Random Useless Facts", one hand tucked under his arm and one leg dangling from the tall piece of furniture that probably houses guns, technology or some other crucially important object that shouldn't be treated like a sofa. Flax finishes stuffing his face. Flax: "What's karaoke?" HPO: "Nevermind. How about this one; The bagpipeBagpipes article, Wikipedia. was originally made from the whole skin of a dead sheep." Flax: "What's a bagpipe?" HPO: "Flax, you've been on this planet for a long time now and you don't know what karaoke is or a bagpipe?" Flax shrugs and pulls out a packet of SkittlesSkittles (confectionary) article, Wikipedia. to chew on. HPO: "Tell you what. Here's one you'll appreciate. On average, there are 178 sesame seeds on each McDonaldsMcDonald's article, Wikipedia. BigMacBig Mac article, Wikipedia. bun." Flax: "Seeds are good for you right? Sounds like I'm getting a lot of healthy things in me!" HPO: "Along with all the unhealthy things too." Flax: "I was going to order a pepperoni pizza and play some HaloHalo (franchise) article, Wikipedia. if you want in, kiddo?" HPO: "I'm not a kid but yes, I want in." In a sudden puff of smoke, Hero Plus One vanishes and is replaced with a little rat. He scuttles down the cupboard and scampers down the corridor. Flax wonders if he should run after the rat but decides he doesn't want to spill his Skittles everywhere. He stomps into the kitchen, which was once large and modern but is now dark and dingy with little-to-no-care taken to clean it. Flax finds the wall phone and hits the speed dial for pizza. In Egypt the sun, as usual, is beating down on the land and baking everyone and everything. Inside a small house with whitewashed walls is Winters. She is wearing a big, heavy redcoat just like the old British army once did, and a pair of white slacks. She ought to be melting inside her own clothes but she's actually an android - indistinguishable from any human unless broken apart to take a peek at the nuts and bolts. She has finally gotten her hands on some arcane magick that she researched in the Great Library and now scries in a plastic dish bowl she got at the supermarket. The spell, despite being used in less than steller conditions, works. Winters, with her sleeves flopping over her wrists, stares into the bowl. She finds her master. Her master is now a girl... Winters realises now this must be the case. She had cast the spell three times and kept looking at some random woman instead of her master. But the fourth time she is certain the spell is perfect and yet she has the woman again. She knows her master can travel his consciousness through his blood so he must now be in the body of this blonde girl. No matter, Britt is still Britt. Even when Britt is now a Britt...ica. She doesn't understand where Brittica is, however. The landscape looks like an ink-well was spilt on a page. She doesn't know many people who would be able to interpret such sights but she can think of one man. A man that also owes Britt(ica) his life... Magick Snowflakes screams with righteous fury as she blows a hole through the head of Hero Plus One with her shotgun. His Halo character at least. HPO: Why, oh why, are you so good at these games?" Magick: "Because I rock. All of the socks." HPO: "And why do you suck at them so much!? Mr Handy-with-a-ray-gun?" Flax is trying to simultaneously play while chomping on a piece of the pizza. He ate half of the pizza to himself while Hero Plus One and Magick Snowflakes shared the other half. He just shrugs by way of reply. Magick: "Next round!" Magick has taken to wearing her pyjamas most of the day, never feeling the need to put proper clothes on. They consist of a black nightshirt and trousers adorned with cartoon puppies. Despite wearing this she also wears her witch-hat most of the day, which flops over her head because it's so over-sized. Its peak is crooked and droops down her back. Her hair is long and messy as it comes down her face like crumpled curtains that have been dyed red. The living room is a mess and has been for many, many months. Stacks of old pizza boxes stand in the corner and the room smells like someone's feet. The three gamers don't seem to notice but when their intrepid leader enters the room she reacts with a choke. Seraphim: "This place is disgusting. Now I remember why I'm never in here." Magick: "Hello Seraphim!" Magick waves a slice of pizza in greeting. HPO: "I didn't know you were here Seraphim, or I would have ordered you something." Seraphim: "I'm not hungry." Seraphim appears to be an ordinary woman, though she was once an angel of Heaven. Cast out for her love of a demon she gradually lost all of her powers that were bestowed upon her by divine right. In the end she even lost her wings. Since then she has used her experience and wisdom to lead Hero Force through its very few, and admittedly easy, campaigns. The two previous leaders of the team had bailed, one for greener pastures and the other for their mental health. Seraphim is still very beautiful, though the heavenly glow that once enamoured all was gone. She wears her white jumpsuit at all times, ready for action every day despite never getting a call. She once wore nothing, her divine light concealing her modesty. But with it gone she devised herself a costume, complete with knee-high boots with deadly heals and a short cape to billow behind her like her wings once did. Now she stands, the last hero ready for action while her teammates eat pizza and play video games. HPO: "We should turn on the SwitchNintendo Switch article, Wikipedia. and play Mario KartMario Kart 8 article, Wikipedia. instead." Magick: "No way! You always win at that!" HPO: "You always win at this!" Flax: "Why don't we ever play those sexy girl games I see on SteamSteam (software) article, Wikipedia. all the time? Even cartoon ladies need some attention from old Flax!" HPO: "You're not meant to play those games in company, that's why." Magick: "So you do play them!?" HPO: "I didn't say that!" Seraphim: "I miss the old days when me and Judge would beat up Ares. Those were good times." HPO: "You shouldn't live in the past, Seraphim. It's not good for your health." Seraphim: "Don't get me started on things bad for your health..." She eyes the fast food and lounging in front of a television. The TV isn't even that big. There's an unexpected ring of the doorbell. HPO: "I didn't even know the doorbell still worked!" Magick: "Who could it be?" Flax: "A mission!? At long last!?" Flax leaps to his feet like a cat and then promptly falls onto the long sofa like a seal. Magick: "At least you tried, Flax. At least you tried." Flax: "What... what happened to me?" Seraphim rushes down the corridor to the front door and swings it open so fast she startles the girl on the other side, who squeals. Hero Plus One appears at Seraphim's side, but keeps himself behind his bold leader in case of sudden attack. Even little girls can bite really hard. Winters: "Hero Force One! I need your help!" HPO: "Hero Force One? Haven't heard that in a while." Seraphim: "Please don't tell me your cat is stuck in a tree?" Winters: "No..." Seraphim: "Your grandmother needs help crossing the road?" Winters: "I don't have a grandmother..." HPO: "How can you not have a grandmother?" Seraphim: "Then what's the problem, little one?" Winters: "I'm here to call on a debt from Dr R. Deep! I need his help to rescue Master Britt..ica! Rescue him-- uh, her from Hell!" HPO: "This sounds suspiciously like a mission! After all this time!" Seraphim: "Yes. Yes it does!" Seraphim grins down at Winters like a cat that saw a rat. HPO: "I'm so glad you don't like at me like that." References External References Category:HFU Post Category:Post